It is polite to say to someone "I understand" or "I'm sorry" or perhaps on fb 2day omg.
For some things, though, empathy is not enough and understanding in not possible.
I suspect being a victim of rape is in that category.
However, I do understand more than I did months ago.
A neighbor broke into my house. Smashed a window, stole a few things, including a laptop. I still don't feel safe in my own house. I still carry my new laptop w/me at all times. When entering the house, I check all the windows to see if any are smashed.
No one touched or harmed my body but my mind has been messed with.
I am on my computer much less often and blog seldom. Not just time but motivation.
I suspect I will be a different juror if ever I am picked again.
And I understand someone running around his neighborhood w/a gun just because neighbors have been robbed.
I look in awe at people who maintain sanity after rape.